Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Movies. Show all posts

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Does Ridley Scott hate Robin Hood?

According to IMDb, the only Robin Hood movie Ridley Scott enjoyed was Robin Hood: Men in Tights (source). Not the 1973 Disney cartoon. Not the 1938 Adventures of... with Errol Flynn. And not even the 1991 Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves, which, in my opinion, was the best of the lot. I'm also fond of the other two. Of course, I like Men in Tights as well, it's a great parody. Anyway, why do I care that some d-bag has taken a crap all over a great legend that has spawned many good movies? Well, it might have something to do with the fact that he tried to make one of his own this year.

Here's the thing: Robin Hood is not supposed to be "great". It's a fun story about an archery nerd who fights the law and gets the girl. The rest is just details, and is probably not well known and/or made up, as each Robin Hood film deviates from the others on these points. The big difference is that the Disney cartoon, Men in Tights, and the 2010 version have a Prince John, a brother to Richard the Lionheart, who seeks the throne. Other details are more minor.

When it comes to criticizing Prince of Thieves, it always comes down to Kevin Costner not having a British accent. That is the only flaw in that film, and frankly, it's so damn good, it's hard to notice. Not to mention the great cast supporting him. It looked good, it felt good, and aside from Mel Brooks' parody, it really didn't need to be messed with, as Kevin Reynolds had created, pretty much, the perfect Robin Hood film. With or without the directors cut that came later (which only added to the Sheriff's backstory, though, the more Alan Rickman the better).

So where did Ridley Scott's version go wrong? Well, right from the beginning, you know this movie has no soul. It's dark and dreary and everything kinda looks the same. It's like they really wanted you to know that this movie takes place nearly a thousand years ago. Because the color TV colorized the world. Yep. And thank God for HDTV, we really needed those extra dots, the world was so blurry before. Yeah. I mean "Amen".

But is looking like crap enough to tarnish a movie? Not if it's excellent. Which this isn't, but giving it a pass -- okay, King Richard is done with the Crusades (a holy war to get the Infidels -- the Muslims -- out of Jerusalem) so he's sacking all the European countries on his way back, specifically France -- wait, what? This has to do with Robin Hood how? Oh, and then instead of staying back and commanding the armies, he's earning his Lionheart title, he's out there playing catch with arrows, blocking them with his shield, making an ass out of himself. Spoiler: He misses one. Catches him right in the throat, too. So right in the middle of battle, he asks for, and receives, wine. Under fire of arrows, his trusted men who didn't have his back before are right there with the wine. I don't think a single one gets shot. Oh, and the guy who shot the King is bragging about it. France and England/the UK have been allies longer, historically, than they've been enemies. Do you really want to be known as the guy who killed the King of England? No, you don't. So shut the f**k up and keep shooting. At most you just wanna say "I got one!" and then go about getting another one.

Oh wait. It gets better. Maid Marian lives on a farm (except it's Marion now, because Ridley's cool like that) and some little kids in masks come and steal all her grain. From a barn two miles from where she's sleeping. But she gets woken up, and she fires a flaming arrow two feet from where one is standing -- and two feet from the barn, which is covered in hay and straw. Good thing she's as good a shot as Robin Hood. She should have fired a second one to split the first one to show how awesome she is.

All the while the movie throws a bunch of characters at you. They may or may not be important. They may or may not be named. An hour later... oh and he's not Robin of Locksley anymore, he's Robin Longstride now. And he meets a fallen knight named Robert Loxley -- yeah, "Locksley" was too much for Mr. Scott -- and takes his name. You would think this would be an issue, that people who knew Robert Loxley would know that Robin Longstride isn't him -- but not only do all but Loxley's wife (Marian) and father not notice, but his father insists he continues to pose as his son, and gives him carte blanche at Marian. Marion, sorry. Marion plays along begrudgingly at first, but then starts to fall in love with him. Because he's played by Russel Crowe, and Loxley was played by some nobody. (I don't know who played him.)

That's just the first half of this 150-minute monstrosity, but that's about when I stopped watching. I usually don't quit movies, but this was bad.

OK, by contrast, my favorite Robin Hood movie...

* Looks great. Who'd have guessed that in real life, medieval England looks beautiful?

* The whole King Richard stuff is backstory. All of it. Because it doesn't f**king matter! King Richard shows up at the end, played by God... I mean Sean Connery... and it's awesome. He's not a pompous ass who gets shot for being a dick.

* Maid Marian's an actual lady. She can take care of herself, more or less, but she's not an expert archer.

* The story is simple. You can follow what's going on. It gets out of the way of the awesomeness. It doesn't feel like a long movie. You get to know the characters very soon after they're introduced (except, perhaps, for Wolf -- the boy chased by the Sheriff's men early on). Oh, and in addition to Sean Connery, it's got Morgan Freeman in it -- as a badass with a scimitar! Also as previously mentioned, Alan Rickman as the Sheriff. That's Professor Snape to you younger kids, and the bad guy in Die Hard to you older folks. Well, that'd be my generation, but damn, I forgot his name.

I give it a solid 2/10 for some decent archery and the potential to be a cool medieval film, and for actors that probably tried real hard to make the best of a crappy movie. Maybe I'll force myself to finish it at some point, but I'm not looking forward to it.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Terminator Salvation... is not bad.

After Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines a few years back, I was completely let down by the Terminator franchise, but I had to take a look at this fourth installment desite the teen-aimed PG-13 rating and the lack of James Cameron and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Dubya's lapdog may be embarrassing the state of California, but in the 80s and 90s, he was actually useful, and made some pretty good movies. Who doesn't like the first two Terminator movies, or Predator, or even Kindergarten Cop?

The first Terminator was a pretty cool movie, but it wasn't exactly great. A plot hole near the end left the possibility of a sequel open, but after 6-7 years, it was kind of a surprise when one was made. Despite being a special-effects showoff, Terminator 2: Judgment Day came out as one of the best action films of the last century. It had the best action sequences out of all four films, and it had the most heart, which really pushed it past just being a good movie, and made it great.

Then Terminator 3 comes out, and they seem to pretend that the second movie didn't happen, or that the ending happened differently. It's less like "this is what happens next" as is common with sequels, and more like "this is what could have happened if what our heroes did in the last movie didn't work". Like the new Star Trek movie, it's best to just classify it as an alternate universe in which the story's not over and the producers can milk the franchise for still more millions of dollars.

All that being said, it's about damn time they made a post-apocalyptic Terminator film. I would have liked to see more of the day-to-day living, how people get by in this new world than just straight-up action, but that isn't bad either. Instead of worrying about the paradoxes of time travel, instead, we have a Terminator who doesn't know he's one who buddies up with Kyle Reese, the hero from the first Terminator, who John Connor sent back to help his mother (and sire him at some point). Also, because it's a PG-13 movie and we're trying to appeal to kids, there's a 9-year-old girl with a funny haircut thrown in pretty randomly. And she has not one line in the entire movie, though Reese says that's because Judgment Day traumatized her. Right. Oh wait, she wasn't entirely useless. She bandages Connor's arm when he cuts it at one point and at another, hands him a flare. (And at least she didn't make the viewers wish her dead, like what happened in the War of the Worlds remake with Dakota Fanning's character.)

Still, Terminator 4 seemed to mostly weave itself into the first two films rather than do anything on its own. Reese's back story is explained, sure, but nothing is accomplished. We have a couple cool chases. The hundred foot high Terminator was cool, as well as the ones built into the motorcycles. All of the cool lines get recycled: "I'll be back", "Come with me if you want to live", etc. They even play Guns n' Roses' song "You Could Be Mine" during one scene. We even have Linda Hamilton's voice as Sarah Connor on a tape John listens to, and everybody doubts his prophecies about the future (and the past now). So it's got all the elements of the Terminator movies, but mostly it's just another action sequel. Still, it's worth watching at least once.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

News Roundup 3

...At least I think it's the third one... It's been a while since I got any keyboard time. I never get much at home; I primarily write these at work, and edit and publish them at home. I've only recently found out that Blogger/Blogspot isn't blocked at work (having inadvertently stumbled upon one of their blogs), but I try to login to as few sites as possible at work, keeping in mind that communications channels can be monitored and logged at the server level, which is probably offsite, at corporate HQ or something. I don't know enough about browser security to know what is and isn't encoded, and to err on the side of caution, I prefer not to let sensitive login information go out over the Net here. Anyway, onto the news.


DRM-free iTunes

So, it seems that iTunes, arguably and at least perceptually the largest legitimate distributor of digital music on the Internet, has abandoned DRM entirely. This is a very bold move for a company which is known for setting trends. The original Macintosh brought desktop computing home in a way IBM didn't think of. Microsoft might have stolen the GUI concept from Xerox before Apple, but Apple did it right first. Fast forward 20 years - the portable Mp3 players were out years before the iPod. First one I saw was Creative's Nomad, a 4GB hard drive in something that looked like two Discmans back to back, ugly as sin with a $450 price tag - and I wanted one. But no, Apple hung back until they could accurately gauge consumer interest, and when the iPod came out, it was what everyone wanted, and they've led the game since. Likewise with cell phones. If they ever make a game console, I imagine it will be pretty impressive. (For a Microsoft product, the Xbox 360 is very good - if Apple's console is to the Xbox 360 what Mac OS X is to Windows Vista, we should all be in for a surprise.) For all this praise, I've never actually owned an Apple product. While I like what they're doing, I don't agree with their approach to certain things. Who I am, I can never be a "Mac user"; the most I'll do with them is appreciate from the outside.

That said, digital music has always been about music lovers. The last big thing, the CD, was the brainchild of the music industry. Actually, at the quality they wanted and the size they wanted, they'd only get 8 minutes on the disc, so I heard. They compromised on both (increased the size and decreased the quality) and we wound up with 5" discs that hold 80 minutes, much less than their predecessors, the cassette tapes, blanks of which came in variable size (limited by the amount of tape on the reels) and sold up to 120 minutes between the two sides. But with digital music, we had these CDs (or CD collections) and we had computers with CD-ROM drives, and hard drives were (and still are) getting bigger. We were willing to use 700MB per 80 minutes of music for our storage, impracticle as that would have been, but the technology just wasn't there. "CD rippers", as they were called, were not very good and failed often, and were not officially supported by any major company, and certainly weren't part of Windows Media Player, as they are now.

Long story short, Mp3s came about, but it wasn't through official channels. The MPEG-1 and MPEG-2 standards were hacked, and an audio format was born, not from a corporation or the MPEG group, but by "regular" people. The music industry ignored it, claiming that Mp3s were much lower quality than CDs. They were smaller in file size, but the quality was the same to most ears. By their claim that Mp3s were such low quality, the music industry all but gave permission for people to share them online. After all, if they were such low quality, they would want the popular songs passed around online. Remember that in the mid-to-late 1990s broadband access was very limited. If you were willing to spend 30 minutes downloading one five-minute song, it must be good, and if you were willing to do that for such a low quality song, you'd probably buy the CD, right? Wrong. DSL got big, a nerd named Shawn Fanning made a program called Napster, and everyone was off to the races. The record industry found itself fighting two battles. Their first battle was a PR battle for the CD format, to claim Mp3s were worthless. Their second battle was to stop people from swapping Mp3s over the Internet. But they really had no way to do that. Only the FBI really tracked people swapping files, but that wasn't music, that was kiddie. They were only willing to use this technology on stuff that was really, really bad, and with the RIAA swearing that Mp3s were far inferior in quality to CDs, it didn't look very serious.

Some years later, of course, the record industry began to recognize Mp3s as a viable means of listening to music. Even though the bitrate (amount of data per second) was about a tenth that of CDs (and keep in mind CDs were themselves inferior to the industry's ideas about digital music), they were all but forced to concede that the human ear just can't tell the difference, and most music lovers can't afford equipment that will make a CD sound better than a well-encoded Mp3. Suing people (or threatening to do so) wasn't working as a deterrent, so they began offering a legal alternative. Apple was one of the first to offer reliable music downloads from most record labels - to this day, only a few smaller ones hold out. The Beatles, for instance, will never be on iTunes, they say, because of a dispute over the name Apple. Apple promised them in the 80s they'd never use the name for music. With iTunes, they casually forgot about that, and John Lennon's band ain't too happy about that. But for the most part, you can get your favorite music on iTunes.

But the music industry has always been two steps behind the so-called pirates. While a pirate gets unrestricted Mp3s which can be used any way they like, the iTunes user can only use their iTunes songs on the computer they downloaded them on, and a couple other devices, and can only be burned to CD with certain restrictions. (Once something's on CD, it can be ripped to unprotected Mp3, but going from Mp3 or even iTunes' AAC files to CD "pads" the data to fill the space of a CD, and to rip that back to something like Mp3 means the whole track, including the "padding", is recompressed, meaning you lose a lot of quality.) So while iTunes was a good idea and worked for some people, it was widely argued (and irrefutable) that you could buy a CD and rip it to Mp3 for not much more than downloading restricted tracks from iTunes - or you could just download the songs for free, albeit illegally. Sony made a much bigger misstep - they planted computer viruses on several CDs under the idea that anyone sticking a music CD in a computer was going to rip it and share it online. They thought they'd kill piracy at the source, but as soon as word got out, many people just stopped buying Sony CDs and started downloading (mostly, illegally) the albums. The Mp3s didn't carry the viruses, and you could play and rip the CD just fine on a Linux computer. Linux, unlike Windows, doesn't take viruses. That is, how a virus works, to do damage and spread, Linux just ain't set up to allow that, like Windows is. So again the "pirates" win.

So now Apple's selling DRM (restriction) free music. They aren't the first - Amazon's done it for a while, for one - but again, Apple's looking at what works and what doesn't. Selling music with restrictions doesn't work. Hasn't worked. Well, it's made them successful, but they must be seeing now they could have done much better had they been DRM free from the get-go (although, the record industry most certainly would not have allowed that then). Now when you download from iTunes, you're getting about the same thing as when you download from illegal sites and services, except now you have a guarantee of quality and authenticity. Oh, and they're still using the AAC format, and the songs probably still contain your personal information, you know, so you don't go sharing them. But that shouldn't deter an honest customer, and if you're paying a buck per song as opposed to freeloading, you're somewhat honest to start with.


Porn industry now wants federal bailout

I'm not entirely sure MSNBC are being completely serious here in reporting that Hustler and Girls Gone Wild are asking for $5 billion from the government. Oh, I'm not surprised; the porn industry, much like pro wrestling, in fact, will do anything to be noticed or recognized by the general public. What the hell, I'll throw 'em a bone and drop 'em a mention. I'm nobody famous to start with. Anyway, Larry Flynt claims that the bad state of the economy means folks are spending less on pornography products.

Mr. Flynt, lemme tell you why your economy's hurting. Ain't got a thing to do with the economy, but economics does come into play. A pornographic DVD costs about $40, about twice what you pay for a Hollywood blockbuster on DVD. Granted, the porn DVD might be four hours long, so per minute it might be cheaper. But still, $40 was what we paid for DVDs before Best Buy and Walmart told us we could get them for under $20. Suncoast, FYE, and other mall-type stores sold most of the DVDs when the format came out, and they set the prices that high. The prices are still that high in those stores. It disgusts most people. We've come to expect to pay no more than $20 for a DVD. Walmart spoils the hell out of people with its $13, $7, and $5 bargain racks and drop boxes. Best Buy runs $10 sales regularly. And used DVDs are cheaper still. So nobody's gonna pay $40 for a DVD that, on top of the cost, they're only gonna watch in private, they aren't gonna watch it with their siblings or parents, and they ain't gonna put it on to occupy the kids - it's a different kind of DVD.

On top of that, commercial porn is pretty extreme... extremely tame, that is. It's commercial pornography. It's regulated. Everyone knows the most common laws. No kids, no animals. The animals part is easy. The kids thing, they have to verify each actor is 18 or older... they have procedures to do all this, get them certified. Not that I'm saying that's a bad thing, but with all the red tape, there's only so much they can do.

Here's the flip side. Here's what's sapping all their money away. It's the Internet. Like with the music, you can get all your commercial porn for free in much the same way. Those $40 DVDs? They can be downloaded for free. No brown bag shipping, your postal carrier doesn't get suspicious, and nobody has been sued for downloading porn that didn't feature kids or animals or rape or other crimes. The government don't care that you download a Hustler DVD. But the problem is bigger than that. High speed Internet plus the growing popularity in digital cameras that double as cheap camcorders means anyone - literally anyone - can whip up a video in ten minutes (as long as it takes to do the deed) and upload it in half an hour, as long as they have high speed Internet. They don't even have to be 18, let alone prove it. Say you download a video made by a pair of 16 year olds. Can you tell they're not 18? Do you really care? Sure, it's technically wrong, but if you don't know, is it so much worse than a video or picture of an 18 year old posing as someone much younger? Because that happens in the industry, and as long as the actor can prove he or she is actually 18, it's legal. A girl can be short, like midget height but not a dwarf, have a flat chest or a near-flat chest, and shave down there, and do a movie, in the role of a 12 year old. She's 18 and has the papers to prove it, but you can't tell she's not 12 by looking at her. What would you rather be caught looking at? What appears to be a 12 year old girl (who's actually 18) or what appears to be a college girl (who's actually 16)? I know what I'd rather be caught with, and it's the same as what I'd rather look at. Still, the point remains, anybody can make porn now. Anyone can get viewers. Selling it is another matter entirely.

Bottom line is, there's much less money to be made in the industry. If the economy was better... that would just mean people were spending frivolously, not that porn's any more valuable because people have money. It don't change the fact that you can get the same stuff and better stuff online for free. Oh... and in commercial stuff the women always fake it, and just about any guy who's not a virgin can tell. It's much more interesting when it's real and you can tell it's real. The industry can make money, they just need big changes in how they do things. Like any other business, really. Change, or be left behind.


Brave techies can try Windows 7 legally

Following, or perhaps to plug a leak, Microsoft has announced that they will allow anybody [brave enough to try] to download Windows 7 from their website. It's an early beta version, so it's not guaranteed to do anything for any particular system configuration, but the average Joe with a modern PC should at least expect it to boot.

Windows 7, Windows 7... what is Windows 7? In layman's terms, it's the next version of Windows, following Vista. The 7 represents (besides luck, which Microsoft will bank on - bank on it) the internal software version. Windows started using version names like most programs; Windows 3.1 was the last. Windows 95 and 98 also belonged to the Windows 3 family, as did the first Windows NT. Windows NT 4, Windows ME, and Windows 2000 represent Windows 4. XP is 5 and Vista is 6. I think. It's really confusing. What this means is that Windows 7 is a whole step above Vista, but since Windows 98 was still in the Windows 3 family with Windows 3.1, it doesn't seem to mean much. And that Vista, like ME before it, proved that newer is not always better. Especially when it comes to Microsoft.

7 isn't a lucky number for Microsoft. Windows Media Player 7 came shipped with technologies based upon the crackpot idea that if Windows Media Player refused to play .AVI files (which pirated movies come off the Net in) that people would give up and buy the DVD. Real smart, Microsoft - all ya did was send the business over to RealNetworks and Apple, as the RealPlayer and QuickTime could still play .AVIs. It's because of WMP 7 that WMP is still not trusted, to this day, why a lot of folks' favorite media players resemble WMP 6.4 (e.g. Media Player Classic, or even VLC, to an extent). WMP 7.1 quickly came out, able to take .AVI files again, but the damage was done. And then Internet Explorer 7 was the first version to come out that people really didn't care about. In the Internet Explorer vs. Netscape days, new versions of one would offset the userbase of the other. Now with Firefox, new IE versions 7 (and 8) didn't touch Firefox's userbase. Maybe if IE 9 includes ad blocking... nah, Microsoft'll never pop that titty out of their mouth. They want their share of the advertising revenue. Mozilla might not be invited to those parties, but something tells me they don't care. And now Windows 7. Third time's a charm?

Vista, for everything wrong with it, is a fundamentally broken OS. It's like what Mac OS was ten years ago. Sure, it looks pretty, but it can't do squat. At least it won't do what you want it to, the way you want it to. You have to learn the "Mac way". Same with Vista. You have to forget what you know and learn to do things the "Vista way". I say... "Uh-uh." I do things MY way. Even Windows XP doesn't always agree with me, but between nLite and a few other programs, I DO do things MY way on MY computer. (OUR computer, should my wife happen to read this.) But Vista, it's exceptionally bad. Take for instance my 750GB SATA drive. SATA's a relatively new hard drive technology that lets data transfer faster. Took me hours to get it working in my BIOS. I almost sent it back. For some reason, Windows XP has no problem with it. But Vista won't touch it unless I reformat it first. Nice, in theory, but it's almost filled with my stuff. Where will I PUT all that stuff while it's reformatting? Therein lies the problem with Vista. "We see you have a drive. We know it's SATA. We speak SATA. But we won't allow you to USE your drive until WE put OUR mark on it... and by the way, that involves erasing it." Before I drop the almighty HELL NO... would I have to reformat it every time I install Vista, or just once? (This ain't the C drive, the system drive, the drive I'm putting Windows on, by the way, this is just a data dump drive. Nothing gets installed on it.) Also, some genius (read: asshole) up in Redmond decided to dump XP's support for sound cards or motherboards' audio components made before 2007 or whenever Vista came out. In other words, I get no sound. Speakers don't work, headphones don't work. My motherboard was... well I bought it in 2005, so it was probably made in 2004... maybe 2003. Socket 939 Gigabyte nForce 4... you figure it out. Still decent, but in 2009 it's dated. And it wasn't blessed by Redmond, so I gets no sounds in Vista. XP don't mind it though.

One more F.U. before I play nice again. This ain't the first time Microsoft's let the public try an operating system before it came out. They did it with Vista, too. No problems there, aside from, well, what I said above, but just a couple months ago, they released the new Xbox 360 OS, Dashboard 2 aka "NXE" or "New Xbox Experience" early. When you install it (simply copy it to a flash drive or burn it to a CD and stick it in the Xbox) it gives you a bunch of crap to read. Nowhere does it say you get kicked off the paid Xbox Live internet service for three weeks until the OS gets force-fed to every 360 connected to the Net (3 months later, my brother-in-law's 360 still runs Dashboard 1 (aka the "blades"), but his isn't online). Nowhere at all. Nor does it give you a chance to reconsider, it just installs and restarts. And then every time you log in it spent 5 minutes looking for Xbox Live and not finding it. So now 3 months later, Microsoft's offering another OS for brave geeks to test... F.U. Microsoft.

Now, as promised, I'll try to play nice. Obviously Windows 7 needs to succeed. It needs to replace Windows XP on the desktop. Here's what needs to happen for that to come about. It's real simple. First of all, it's gotta run just as well on anything XP runs on. That has got to be a given. If I have a computer running XP and XP works with all my devices, Windows 7 needs to do the same thing. I can't install Windows 7 and have it tell me it doesn't like my printer or my camera or my flash drive, or my SATA drive, anything. It's gotta just work. All the basics need to be there. Because if they're not, I'm gonna go right back to XP and it's gonna take a small miracle to get me to try Windows 7 again. First thing they need to do is take all the drivers off the Windows XP disc and make them work with Windows 7. Maybe Windows 7 has some better drivers. Fine. But it comes on a DVD. It's not quite 4GB. There's room on the disc for both versions. Get everything working with the XP drivers during install. A couple days later, pop up a bubble saying "We have Windows 7 drivers for the following devices. This... that... the other... Would you like to try?" Then - and this is important - ONE at a time, starting with LEAST important, you upgrade the driver. If it works, the NEXT DAY, you offer to upgrade another driver. If it doesn't work, we go back to the XP driver. Once all drivers have been updated or tested, it gives you a report. Either all your devices work under Windows 7 drivers, or some (or all) need the XP drivers. The program then gives you a file, maybe even offers to burn it to CD (maybe you can even re-burn your Windows 7 installer DVD) and this lets it set the driver version during install, so you have the best working drivers next time you install.

Second, we need a transition mode. Full learning mode means you turn the OS into an XP clone. It's Windows 7 under the hood, but looks and feels like XP. Every time you go to do something, it offers to show you how the same thing would be done in Windows 7. You can tell it you know and it won't ask again, you can say "not now" to do it later, or you can look, and a Flash video or something would come up and show you. It ain't to my benefit that Vista moved everything around. I like how XP works. However, Vista is a little more approachable to Suzy Q Soccermom than XP, and that's a good thing, in the grander scheme of things. XP could pretend to be Windows 2000 and it did it quite well. Why can't Vista pretend to be XP, even if just for a while while the user learns the new stuff? Windows 7 ought to do this. As an extension of this point, not everybody wants a pretty OS. Yeah, we might all want a picture of our kid or a nice nature shot on the desktop, yeah, but the entire OS? Yeah, that's good for the soccer moms and junior high kids learning computers, but businesses and nerds alike want something more serious. Gates said 25 years ago that his vision was a computer on every desk running Microsoft software. We're there. We were there 10 years ago. Now they need to acknowledge that not everybody's the same, and give more people what they want, more choices.

Windows 2000 was the first really good version of Windows, and the only reason most of its users now use XP is because after the first service pack, it really had everything Win2k had, but a couple more features and looked a little better. Windows 7 needs to put the legacy of Win2k and Windows XP first, the productivity and efficiency second, and aesthetics a distant third, if it's to succeed.


Congress asked to delay the Digital TV conversion next month

Now what the shit is this? People are whining that their TV won't work after the change. The project's out of money. I say let them whine. These aren't real people who have anything to say worth hearing. These are just people looking for something to whine about. If it wasn't this, it'd be something else.

They've only been talking about doing this for over a year now. Several channels run a feed about the conversion; I know The CW runs theirs hourly, and it's very hard to miss. So people know. They've known for over a year. I would say that if you don't know by now, you haven't been watching TV, and you don't have any place to complain about not having TV in a month and a half because... you don't watch it now.

On top of that, the government is willing to pay for your conversion box. The basic model costs $40, the value of the voucher. There are more advanced models, but if your needs are simple, just get the basic one the voucher covers. All you're responsible for is the sales tax. Even if it's 10% it's only $4. If your TV's not worth $4 you don't deserve to have it. Don't you pay that much for batteries anyway when they go out?

And then you don't even need a converter box if you have digital cable or satellite, or a digital TV. Here's the real issue. Local TV stations which broadcast via antenna are going to switch to digital. Most already broadcast in digital as well. They're just going to stop doing analog. ALL this means is analog TVs (SDTV=analog; HDTV=digital, for the most part) receiving analog broadcasts are going to not be able to do so in March. If you have an analog TV and you get cable or have satellite, you're fine. If you have digital TV and have a digital antenna, you're fine.

Who relies primarily on an antenna anyway? Well, at work, we do. We have a tiny little TV with bunny ears on it. We can pick up four stations. We haven't got a converter box. If I had been working here six months ago, I would have applied for a coupon and bought a converter box. I'd have eaten the $4 so my coworkers could still have TV after the switch. Because I knew about this for months. But I'm relatively new here, and now that there are no more coupons, it isn't an option. Besides, some speculate that since the place has satellite TV in other areas, they'll hook us up. (Yeah, right, eh?) Me, well, I got my flash drive and (for now, until it's over) my Babylon 5 episodes. I watch TV and whatnot on the computer.

All that being said, removing access to a technology that seems to work fine is stupid. What, really, are we going to gain by cutting off analog TV? You ask me, I think this whole thing's funded by Sony or someone selling HDTVs. Maybe the HDTV makers, a few cable companies, and DirecTV and/or Dish Network got together and whipped this stupid mess up. Nobody should be forced to upgrade. But it's been on the table for over a year, they're willing to pay for your upgrade, so I say quit bitchin and take it - or shut up and enjoy the snow on your TV come March.

Monday, September 8, 2008

The three best movie trailers ever

Who doesn't love movie trailers? Some say the trailers are the best part of the movie. People have paid to see movies just for one trailer. (Read on, one such trailer makes the list.) Trailers were so popular on Apple's QuickTime gallery that they required QuickTime Pro (a $30 license) to view some of their most popular trailers.

Almost all trailers have major spoilers, and most give away important parts of the movie being advertised. Many show all the best parts of a movie. The justification for this is that they're shown before a movie you are hopefully very interested in (as you paid good money for your ticket), and most people will forget the bulk of most trailers after the feature presentation is over, leaving them with a positive feeling about the movies advertised.

There are three kinds of trailers. The first trailer is not a trailer but a teaser. A teaser is usually about a minute long and often contains a lot of text, music, special effects, not a lot of bulk. The purpose is to let you know the movie's coming and to leave you wanting more. Next comes the actual trailer. These start at about two and a half to three minutes and contain spoilers and the bulk of the movie (lots of action if an action movie, the best jokes if a comedy, and so on). They're designed to make you love the movie, so you'll pay to see it when it comes out. Often there's more than one trailer. Sometimes they're rotated, sometimes one follows the other. Then you have the TV spots. Always about 15 or 30 seconds long, and there are almost always at least three or four of them. Sometimes different TV spots focus on different aspects of the film, sometimes they're just different teasers.

While almost all trailers are memorable at the time, most of them are forgotten after you see the movie. They no longer have any purpose, really. With the introduction of high-speed Internet, we can download them, or just watch them online, but which ones are worth watching months or years after the movie came out? Here are, in my opinion, the three most memorable trailers.

#3: Lord of the Rings Trilogy Teaser
I believe it was March or May 2001. Sept. 11 hadn't changed the world yet, and we were already being treated to an amazing trilogy, we'd seen one two years prior and were a year away from the second installment. Fantasy nerds and bookworms had read Lord of the Rings. The Hobbit was read in schools, but to casual readers, Lord of the Rings was rather slow starting. It was respected but not widely read, not by this generation anyway. Then this teaser came out. Longer than a traditional teaser, but then again, it was for three movies.

Fire, lightning, runes, and a cool little poem ("...and in the darkness bind them") isn't a bad way to start a trailer. Following it with an epic battle, horses running in the darkness, some randomly cool fantasy scenes - then it just drops off about a minute in. You get a cool, quotable line ("Even the smallest person can change the course of history") and then the title shot. That would be enough to satisfy the fanboys. It could have ended right there and been nearly as effective. But no. Let's show off closeups of the major heroes with a vocal choir singing softly in the background while title cards announce each film's release date. Christmas 2001 for Fellowship, Christmas 2002 for Towers, and, you guessed it, Christmas 2003 for Return. Another cool quote and the names of the main actors. Beautiful presentation and of course it got everyone talking.

I don't think Fellowship of the Ring really lived up to this trailer, but Fellowship of the Ring (the book) was always the weakest link, anyway. It's really just the introduction to the series, sets the stage for things to come, and of course The Two Towers more than redeemed the series. (Fellowship wasn't that bad, but still didn't live up to the trailer.)

#2. Star Wars Original Trilogy Trailer
The year was 1996. It was fall, maybe October, maybe November. Most trailers fill the screen, but this one didn't. This one put a tiny sqaure TV in the middle of the screen and said, in a 1960s Twilight Zone kind of voice, "For an entire generation, people have experienced Star Wars the only way it's been possible: on the TV screen." They just make TVs sound so bad. I'd watched the movies countless times, of course, who hasn't? And it was just fine on the TV. Of course anything's gonna look better on the big screen, but these movies were almost 20 years old and I'd long accepted that the best I'd ever see these movies would be on a big-screen TV (which I never did). Then this bad boy comes out. And then the X-wing flies out of the TV and all of a sudden the whole theater collectively gasps as the X-wing fills the theater screen, the volume goes up, and jaws hit the floor.

YouTube really doesn't give this trailer justice. Watching it online (and having seen it in the theaters, and having seen it on DVD, upconverted on an HDTV), it loses most of the effect it had in theaters, except for right when the X-wing breaks out, and at the end of the trailer when the Death Star blows up. The overall presentation isn't as good as the Lord of the Rings teaser, but overall it's more effective - and much more memorable.

And the best, most memorable theatrical trailer of all time... drum roll...

#1: Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace Trailer
November 1998, two years after the above trailer came out. There were rumors of a new Star Wars trilogy, but I hadn't heard them. I was too busy watching the remastered and updated Star Wars movies on VHS over and over, particularly A New Hope (the very first one, more commonly just called "Star Wars" - my favorite movie of all time).

The Lucasfilm logo would clue most people in. Not me. I knew Lucasfilm made Star Wars and Indiana Jones, but I assumed they made much more than that, so it wasn't like "OMG new Star Wars" it was more like "Oh cool, another movie from the guys who made Star Wars". Still, it had me at the edge of my seat. Of course, the music clued me in a second or two later. Then we get a whole bunch of cool sci-fi shots. The pod race, gunfighting in a big hall, space flight, the chromed-out ship parked in the desert, the queen with too much makeup and the funny hair, big robots, and funny creatures (Jar-Jar and Watto).

Then, as if it couldn't get any hotter, Samuel L. Jackson appears on screen and starts talking about a prophecy. If you don't guess that the little boy highlighted next is Anakin Skywalker, father of Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia, the guy who becomes Darth Vader, the baddest villain ever made in America (Final Fantasy VII's Sephiroth is a strong contender, but we can say Sephiroth is Japan's baddest villain and Vader, America's). We then see Anakin meet a much younger Obi-Wan Kenobi, which is really special because, as we all know from A New Hope, Anakin's the one who (as Darth Vader) kills Obi-Wan so many years later. We then see Yoda, and for the first time heard that great quote that was repeated and parodied ad nauseum for years to come. And here it is again: "I sense much fear in you. Fear, is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to... suf-fer-ing...!" And then that badass double-bladed lightsaber, and holding it - our third Sith lord, after Vader and the Emporer from the original trilogy. We finish with some more cool shots and then the title card.

You know, I don't think there's a Star Wars fan alive who hasn't ripped on Phantom Menace. "It was a kid's movie." "It was Star Wars dumbed down for younger kids." Blah blah blah. But I can't say too much - I'm guilty of this myself. But there also wasn't a Star Wars fan who didn't fall in love with Phantom Menace as soon as they saw this trailer. This one trailer set the stage for six years of anticipation. We knew Anakin Skywalker was going over to the Dark Side. We didn't know who Luke's mom was just yet, although we had an idea. And we didn't know just how it was going to happen. Six years, though.

After seeing Phantom Menace in May of 1999, it was happy and sad. Happy, that we'd seen the first Star Wars movie in 22 years if you don't count the Endor movies (and most of us don't), but sad because it would be 3 years until the next one. Whatever was going on, as much as whatever job sucked at the time, I had Episode II to look forward to. We didn't know what it was going to be called, of course, and the announcement of the title in mid-2001 led to much speculation. Same thing after seeing Attack of the Clones. Another three years. And despite any real or inferred shortcomings of the Prequel Trilogy, no one can deny that they complete the saga.

Sort of. Lucas originally planned a trilogy of trilogies. Anakin's story, Luke's story, and Leia's story. I doubt any true Star Wars fans believed Lucas when he said he was done with it with six. Here he is now releasing that Clone Wars cartoon AGAIN. (As if they didn't already do a Clone Wars cartoon in 2005.) Like the rest of us, George Lucas loves making money. He may not know he's doing Episodes 7, 8, and 9 yet, but he will. And if (God forbid) he passes on first, someone else will. The movies are guaranteed to sell tickets. The money is there to be made. The economy is hurting right now. If 20th Century Fox and Lucasfilm ever need a get out of jail free card, it's the third Star Wars trilogy. Mark my words, they'll do it. And it probably won't take them 22 years, either.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Waiting for Tropical Storm Hanna

So, the past 24 hours or so we've been waiting for this storm that kinda didn't happen.

Yesterday morning, I got off work. Pretty clear conditions. I stayed up for a while thinking something might happen early (I kind of had my facts wrong, too - it happens).

Finally get some sleep, but we wake up kinda early. Got maybe 4 hours sleep tops. Because we're still expecting this thing to happen sometime today.

Then we get the info that Hanna's supposed to make landfall at 2am around Wilmington (for those not from here, it's a coastal town near the NC/SC border) and at around 2am Sunday morning, it's supposed to be long gone, through Virginia. OK.

We go to the store for some stuff, thinking we were going to need to stock up and all that good stuff. The local Food Lion has these metal shutters over their windows, not real shutters but rather some kind of paneling they just threw up real ghetto-like. I wish I'd gotten pictures. Oh, and a sign that said "Yes we're open", one of those Coca-Cola banners smaller stores have. Epic fail for not saying "I assure you we're open" ("Clerks." reference). It didn't even need to be shoe polish on a bedsheet, just the words - would it be too much to ask? Oh well. We scored the bare necessities. You know... bread, milk, bologna, cheapo frozen pizzas, Whoppers (Hershey's, not Burger King's), etc.

We get home. Still no rain. It's a pretty nice day out. Hardly a cloud in the sky. And everyone's making like it's Hurricane Floyd (1999) all over again.

We decide to make it a movie night. First up was Layer Cake, a pretty good British gangster flick starring Daniel Craig (the recent James Bond) and Colm Meaney (best known as the transporter chief and handyman from Star Trek: The Next Generation and Deep Space Nine). I love seeing Star Trek actors curse, drink, do drugs, or otherwise engage in behaviour they never would on a G/PG television program.

Then we watched WWE Friday Night SmackDown! on the DVR. Decent show, but it sucks Mick Foley's no longer on commentary, I loved his personal style. And that Edge is taking a break (read: Undertaker sent him to Hell at Summerslam), he always puts on a good show. Undertaker's uber-awesome dramatic entry was interrupted by a storm update, which of course we skipped because it was by then three hours outdated. We got treated to a pretty good match between MVP and Shelton Benjamin, two heels who usually put on good matches. Jeff Hardy's talents got wasted on a mostly worthless act they call "The Brian Kendrick". The guy's got talent, but in trying to build him as a heel, they just have him steal matches. Boring. Shelton Benjamin is a heel and still puts on good matches, but then he's established. Main event sucked - long story short, Triple H got punk'd by half the locker room. Boring. He still pinned Khali after a Pedigree. Oh, and there were a couple Diva matches.

Checked the weather again. Nothing too big, still pretty calm.

Next movie up, Ready to Rumble. SmackDown! didn't really fulfill our pro wrestling fix, so we watched this 90 minute ad for WCW (WWE's competition in the 90s which they now own). Pretty good movie along the lines of Joe Dirt. A couple of losers travel 3 hours to see a taping of WCW Monday Nitro only to see their hero lose his title, so they track him down and find out he's an even bigger loser than they are, but they don't give up, ultimately taking him to Las Vegas in an attempt to win his belt (and respect) back. It was better than I thought it would be at the start - and half an hour in. For a while it was looking pretty bad. I'm not sure if it gives a better or worse depiction of pro wrestling than exists in reality. I really need to read more books on the backstage politics and technical side; while I do enjoy watching as a fan, I'm much more interested in the production of the show. (Yes, I'd love to work for WWE - just as a tech guy though. Meeting some of the legends and superstars wouldn't be a bad bonus either.)

So anyway, movie ends and my wife pretty much declares the storm a no-show and heads to bed. And here I am, 6:30 in the morning, typing away the PG-side of the night's events. I'm hearing a bit of wind outside, but looking at wunderground.com's live radar, which is even better than what they show on TV (Google Maps with a live radar = pure win) and it looks like TS Hanna went farther inland than originally anticipated. It's probably pretty wet in Raleigh, and Greenville might be seeing some drippage, but it's still mostly dry here. We've had some light rain.

Here's a screenshot of wunderground's map, with some notes of my own.



The red circles is about where TS Hanna hit land, just south of Wilmington. I think technically the eye of the storm landed on our side of the border, but I'm not sure. Close enough anyway, and I'm sure Myrtle Beach (SC city/tourist trap just south of the border) got hit with some rainfall earlier. It actually hasn't reached Raleigh yet, but should any time now. The thin red lines are my guesses (from having watched it all night) as to where the worst of it will go. The red star (directly south of Washington) is approximately where we are. Chocowinity, NC - zip code 27817 - if you'd like to look it up.

We will get wet by the time it's passed us by, but it won't be as bad as we thought.

What we have to worry about is Hurricane Ike, which is right behind Hanna. Earlier I mentioned Hurricane Floyd, but people who were here when that hit said it wasn't even that bad, it's just that it too was right behind another hurricane, Dennis, so the one-two punch is what did the damage. We've got a tropical storm followed by a hurricane followed by a tropical storm (Josephine's the third one). And of course it all depends on what path they will follow when they reach us. Experts are almost certain it'll hit Florida, but the question is whether it will follow the Atlantic seaboard up and hit the Carolinas or continue through the Gulf and tear up the Gulf states. And then there's Josephine, can't forget about that one.

It's not too tough tracking the storms, really. You see these guys on TV and they sound so smart, but nowadays Joe Citizen has access to many of the same resources. You can use the more popular weather.com (The Weather Channel) but I find wunderground.com to be more direct, easier to get at the relevant information for a quick drive-by check. Or you can be a real nerd and check both. But tracking storms isn't the important part, preparing for them is. Both phones charged, we have water, we have food, we have flashlights. As long as we have power, we can watch the news or go online for information, but if we lose power, we have the Net on our phones. No live radar or any bells and whistles, but we can get basic info.

So to our friends and family, we're safe from Hanna, I think it's safe to say. Ike and Josephine though... we'll have to keep you posted on that. (And that strong wind I heard earlier is gone now.)

Last note: It's coming a little more to the east now, but rather than Raleigh getting the eye, I think it's going to pass through Wilson. Not too far off. Greenville isn't going to fare much worse than I initially thought, and we still look clear. But I'm only seeing the front band, or arm making a huge arc to the west, from Fayetteville through Chapel Hill and up into Richmond, VA. There should be a trailing band or arm that will probably slap us later in the day, but that should be weaker.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Google makes a browser, but Zack & Miri Make a Porno

Just a few days ago, Google proved the rumours true. The rumours I speak of (as there are many surrounding the rainbow-coloured-logo'd Web giant) concern a Web browser to take on not only Microsoft's Internet Explorer, but Mozilla Firefox as well. That browser is here, it's called Google Chrome, and it's sexy as hell.

So why would Google, a longtime Firefox supporter, flip on Mozilla and begin competing with them? The answer is simple: $, £, €, ¥, you get the idea. If you're a fan of Google, as I am, you probably already know that they are the best at what they do, and if they're not, they're either working to improve or saving up to purchase their competition. Gmail thoroughly owns Yahoo! Mail and Windows Live Mail. Mapquest? The 90s called, they want their online maps back. Now in the 21st century, we use Google Earth. Forget mapping; we now use a virtual globe with satellite photos. And when Google Video failed, they up and bought YouTube.

All free.

So how do they pay for all this, their employees, and upkeep on their beautiful Mountain View, CA office? Advertising. That, and investments, but a big chunk of their money comes from advertisements. You run a search, and the results are preceded by sponsored results. You check your email, and ads similar to the content of the email is displayed. They have a massive database of ads to match keywords to, and sponsors want in. In a big way.

But if you use Firefox, you can block Google's ads and hide the sponsored search results, so you get the best Google has to offer while Google gets nothing for providing these great services.

Chrome is Google's answer to Firefox and the extensions that cut off their revenue. In exchange for giving up these conveniences, Chrome offers a very small and lightweight tabbed browser experience, which seems to load pages about twice as fast as Firefox 3. There's also this weird security feature that lets spyware and viruses through, but into some virtual space that is destroyed when you close the tab. Sounds scary and cool at the same time, but I don't visit sites that would install malware anyway. I wouldn't know where to begin with that.

If you use Firefox for whatever reason, especially if you don't block ads, you owe it to yourself to at least give Chrome a chance. It really is a nice browser.

And now for something completely different, Zack and Miri are making a porno! If those names mean nothing to you, how about Kevin Smith and Seth Rogen? Rogen you may know from Superbad or Knocked Up, and Kevin Smith is that sick writer/director behind Clerks., Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Jersey Girl, and Clerks 2. He also plays Silent Bob in all of those but Jersey Girl. Rogen is Zack, and Miri is played by Elizabeth Banks. Early reports don't shine much hope into a possibility of screen time for Smith, but his comedy partners Jason Mewes (Jay) and Jeff Anderson (Randal) have parts.

The premise is pretty simple. Zack and Miri are lifelong platonic friends going to college who decide to make adult films to make ends meet. What else do you need to know? Oh yeah, do they do it, or is this another Hollywood cop-out (I'm lookin' RIGHT at you, Hostel)? Seth Rogen describes the film as filthy, but defends the use of nudity and sex in films. The MPAA slapped an NC-17 rating on it. Smith appealed without changing a thing, and it's getting an R rating, but just barely.

Google's Chrome is out now, but you're going to have to wait until Halloween to see Kevin Smith's Porno. Until then, you can check out the red-band trailer. You know how the "The following PREVIEW" card that flashes before every trailer has a green rating? Trailers are rated, too, but they only have two ratings. All Audiences, or green-band, is the most common by far. Restricted, or red-band, is very rare. You won't see them in theaters, as they almost always contain language, violence, or even nudity. Zack and Miri's trailer earns the red band for language alone.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Why buying online is better

Foreword: This post is neither sponsored nor endorsed by any companies named here. I'm writing this of my own experiences, because I want to, not because I'm being paid to or offered any discounts the general public can't get.

I just bought a stack of blank DVD+R discs. Normally I pay $25 or so at Walmart (probably $24.83 or something, you know how precise they are with their prices) for a 50-stack, which is a pretty fair deal. It averages out to about 50¢ a disc. Not bad for 4.45GB of one-time written storage. When we have kids, they won't touch our real DVDs - either they'll use copies or we'll have them on the computer somehow. A good friend at work stopped buying DVDs because his neice and nephews were trashing them - that won't happen to us. And, you know, you buy something, "they" don't like you copying it, but neither are "they" in a big hurry to replace them when your kids damage them, "their" answer is to just go buy another copy of the movie at $20 a pop. But then "they" have never had to worry about that next paycheck or where the money to buy diapers or milk will come from, so you gotta do what you gotta do, right? But enough of the social rant. $25 for a 50-stack of DVD+R discs is pretty good, is it not? Sure it is.. Unless you can get a 100-stack for $31.60 shipped at Newegg.com. But, while Walmart is real precise with their prices, Newegg's fluctuate. Tomorrow it might be a buck more or less, Newegg is a very strange beast.

However, Newegg beats if not annihilates that "great deal" you see at Walmart or Best Buy or Circuit City wherever, all the time. And DVD media is just the beginning. Go price hard drives at Best Buy. Write down the brand, the capacity (80GB, 160GB, etc.), the speed (5400RPM, 7200RPM, etc.), the interface (IDE or SATA, etc.) and any other information - model number works great. Jot down a few. Oh, and be SURE to note the price. Then look the drives up on Newegg and see if the price isn't right around half. Same thing with DVD burners. Best Buy's prices do seem fair, for what you're getting. A DVD burner is something really special to have, right? Without shipping, Newegg lets them go daily for under $30! I never see them below $60 in Best Buy's printed ad.

With that in mind, when I say in March 2005 I ordered the parts to build this computer and spent about $1200 on Newegg.com, how much do you think those parts would have cost me at Fry's? (Neither Best Buy nor Circuit City, certainly not Walmart, sell the parts to build a computer, but Fry's does.) Yeah, you can bet this is a $2500 PC by retail pricing. Then you factor in what your average geek, independent or working for a place like that, is going to charge you to build it. To have this computer built for you in March 2005 would have cost you easily $3,000-$3,200 and I did it for $1200. That's some serious cash. And for what? For whom? Does stuff really need to be marked up that high?

Remember, Newegg doesn't just cover computer parts. They have all kinds of accessories. From blank discs to flash drives (and flash cards) to crap you just don't need. Watch the bundle deals, every now and then they'll throw something in for free. I've gotten 2 stickers and a shirt for free with stuff. And when I got my computer stuff, I bundled a motherboard, a CPU, and one of the sticks of memory and got a free digital download of the game Half-Life 2, at the time valued at $60 (and called "The Best Game Ever Made" by, I think, PC Gamer - although I disagree with it, it still means something).

I'm not done here - and computer stuff at Newegg is just the start.

You probably know that if you buy movies and music the first week they're out, you get a good deal, especially if it's a major album or movie. Best Buy tends to sell albums for around $10 and Walmart sells most new movies for $15.99, in both cases for the first week only. I don't think you can beat that buying them online. But after that first week, the price goes way up. Some CD stores have the audacity to charge as much as $22 for an album. At Best Buy it's closer to $15, and of course Walmart has to sell them for a buck or two less, but they only sell the "clean" albums, so unless you're some kind of 17th century prude, you shouldn't be buying music at Walmart anyway; supporting censorship is wrong for so many reasons. Look on Amazon, though, and you can find the same albums for $12.99 or $13.99. And same with DVDs, after that first week they can go for as much as $21-22, or right at $20 at Walmart, but they're usually a buck or so cheaper at Amazon.com. So where's the break? Well, most DVD and CD sellers sell 20-year-old classics at the same price as current hits. Not so on Amazon - you can usually get movies that are just a few years old for right around $10. Add the fact that you get free shipping if you spend $25 or more, you're looking at some good deals. Maybe get a new DVD you want for $20, then browse their bargains and pick up an old favorite for around $10, $30 for 2 movies and free shipping isn't bad at all.

Now here's a way to really get a deal with Amazon, but it requires having a Coinstar kiosk at a grocery store near you with Amazon.com gift code functionality. Just approach the Coinstar, hit the button to start, tell it you have coins, and see what your options are. All Coinstars let you turn in your coins for cash with an 8.9% fee, and most let you donate to various charities. Look for a Gift Certificate option. You should get free coin counting this way, with the minor stipulation that you have to have at least $5 and no more than $500 in change. Out here, the two Harris Teeters in Greenville, NC, have gift code/cards (they actually spit out cards in some cases), but a couple Food Lions are strictly cash/donate. You'll have to look around some in your own area. Now what you do is, make a habit of only spending paper money and pennies - and nickels if you want to push it. You take your change and put it in a jar. Never spend dimes and quarters, or nickels if you want it to go a little faster. The thing about pennies, they aren't worth the space they take up in your jar, especially if the jar is small. Nickels really don't, either. The most space-efficient coin is actually the dime, but quarters aren't far behind. If I save dimes, quarters, and a few nickels for 3 months, I can have close to $50 in coins. That's 5 not-so-recent movies and I might have to pay a buck or two. Or if I don't spend it all, Amazon keeps the remainder of the gift amount for the next transaction, up to 2 years, I think. The trick with saving coins, though, is strategy. You don't want to throw pennies away, as a matter of fact you should have 4 on you as often as possible, so you can get your change back in other denominations. Do the math quickly in your head - if you would get a nickel back, give up another nickel to make it a dime. It's best to use self-checkout machines, like at the grocery store, rather than burdening a cashier with the hard math.

But yeah, I have over 300 DVDs - at full price that's about $6,000 in DVDs, and I know I didn't pay that. I have spent a lot on them over the years, enough to perhaps own some stock in the movie industry. My collection isn't nearly the biggest, possibly not even among working-class movie lovers. I've seen some nice collections, but you know people with collections like those aren't worrying about money. But I'm talking wall to wall shelves custom built, 2, 3, 4 copies of the same movie in different editions, pretty much every edition of every movie they don't hate, just because. That's just ridiculous, but you can get DVDs for a heck of a lot cheaper than in the stores.

And that's just new. If you're willing to accept nonremovable stickers all over your DVD case, maybe the disc itself, maybe some writing on the case or disc label, maybe a smudge on the disc, and the knowledge that someone else owned it before you, you can get some killer deals on used DVDs. First of all Amazon, which I already mentioned. Just look up the movie you want, and look for more buying options near the top, on the right. Note that buying from others through Amazon doesn't count towards free shipping, and shipping is often higher buying from third-party sellers, so you have to factor shipping in as part of the cost. Some sellers will sell some things for a penny because the shipping is marked up enough that they turn enough of a profit in the shipping that they don't care about getting more. So you might get lucky. In brick-and-mortar stores, of course your Blockbuster and Hollywood video stores have used DVDs, but did you know Gamestop (formerly EB Games) has them as well? They usually have quite a lot, at better deals than Blockbuster and Hollywood offer. And unlike them, Gamestop's are bought from real people, so the DVDs are the same ones you can buy, whereas Blockbuster and Hollywood only sell retired rentals. How many times was a DVD rented out before it was retired, you have to wonder. And then the case might be different, and it's possible the DVD will have different (often less, I think) special features than the retail one. After all, it's just for rental. Some rental places are ignorant to "original aspect ratio" and only sell "Fullscreen" (aka "missing 1/3-2/3 of the picture") DVDs, and most only sell the Theatrical cut of a movie if an Unrated version is available.

Friday, September 28, 2007

It's human nature for Star Wars' Jedi to turn to the dark side

If you didn't already know, I'm a big fan of Star Wars and Star Trek, and find myself thinking about

All my life I've idealized the Vulcan (Star Trek) and Jedi (Star Wars) way of thinking, logic before emotion, etc., but you know, that's only (no offense to fans) viable within the somewhat narrow plot structures of the story. You try that in real life and see where it gets you.


Be that as it may, Obi-Wan Kenobi (in both OT and PT) seems to have the Jedi Code down pat. He doesn't show any emotion, he's just this cool, calm and collected dude who does what needs to be done. He shows a little bit of passion once in a while (like when he fights Grievous) but it's kept in check.

Then you have Anakin Skywalker. He's always been emotional, from TPM, through AOTC, and into ROTS. So Anakin turned to the Dark Side, despite his Jedi training, and yet through these movies we see over a dozen Jedi (on the council, fighting alongside Mace Windu in AOTC, Order 66 scenes in ROTS, etc.), these guys of various races for whom the training was also successful.

So we are led to believe that Anakin is the odd man out here, the "one" that turned to the Dark Side. But looking at it, I think Anakin was the most human of them all. (Maybe humans make bad Jedi, hence why most of them on the council are not human?) He was angry at the slave traders for what they did to his mother. He was angry at the Sand People for killing his mother. He fell in love with a beautiful girl who took a special interest in him.

And, while the Jedi Order forbids him to love, a Sith offers to protect his unborn child(ren) from a perceived threat (albeit probably created by said Sith and somehow sent to Anakin's dreams), he changes sides. Not to mention that he feels underutilized by the Jedi Council. Within the SW universe we see that as a bad thing, but in real life, if you work for one company and they're not paying you what you feel you deserve, they're not utilizing the specific skills that you bring to the table, and their competitor offers you a position that satisfies both pay and skill, moving is the wise choice.

Back to my first paragraph, about trying to be like the Jedi in real life. No, I've never dressed up, I don't own a lightsaber replica, and no, I haven't tried to live my life as a Jedi (or Vulcan). The way of life does appeal to me, however. Thinking about it, beyond the confines of the story, a Jedi must be a real coldhearted son of a bitch, right? While I agree with why the Jedi (and Vulcans) suppress emotion, one must not forget that the most powerful emotion isn't hate, it is love. I mean, you can kill for hate, and you can kill for love, but can you kill yourself for hate? Not as readily as you would (e.g. take a bullet for someone) for true love.

And I don't just mean love of a spouse, a partner. I think it's the Jews, the Hebrew language has six or seven words that translate, in English, to love. Love for a deity, love for your spouse/partner, love for your offspring, love for your parents, love for your siblings, love for your friends, love for the self. Without researching it, I think those are the seven types. Then there's patriotism (in SW: love for the Jedi Order, and/or for the Republic), a kind of love as well, more a passion for something. I know the Jedi know loyalty, but how passionate are they, without using emotion?

Human nature is such that, if you forbid something, the mind, or people in general, want it more. Alcohol and a certain herb classified as a drug were/are many times more popular in their respective prohibitions. You tell a kid not to touch something, they're going to do it anyway, to see what happens, and to see what you're going to do about it. Put that into the SW universe, and you take a kid (doesn't matter which one, but Anakin for example) who is Force sensitive, and offer to train them, repress their emotions, it's going to come out sooner or later when human nature takes over. Maybe whatever race Yoda is (Wikipedia gives it as Whil, but more official sources have his race unnamed and say he ISN'T a Whil...) either don't feel emotions, or like Star Trek's Vulcans, they've phased them out over a few centuries, but humans in SW are enough like humans on Earth; that's why Star Wars appeals to us. We can see ourselves in Luke or Han or Anakin, they're like us. And thus prey to the same human nature.

I thus conclude that, by nature, Jedi are prone to turn to the Dark Side by fault of human nature.

I posted this over on GameFAQs with a couple minor changes, for example one word had to be starred out due to a bad-word policy, and the last paragraph had to be put in the first reply, along with notes as to why it was split (a technical limitation in the GameFAQs forum system that limits post input to 4,096 characters). And also, as a final note, if you aren't as familiar with the Star Wars universe or more of a casual fan, you can click some of these links above to be taken to the Wikipedia page on that subject.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Plantar Wart update, #1

I say #1 because I fear there will be more developments in the case of my plantar wart, and not all of them good. So where was I...? Ah yes, Friday morning. Jen was supposed to wake me up at 6:30 or thereabouts after a short nap, but when she got up to leave, she said I was sleeping so soundly she just couldn't disturb me. I was a little disappointed she'd left me out, but also partially relieved she allowed me extra sleep I quite honestly needed anyway. I got ahold of her closer to 9am, I think, and she and her mom were just coming back from Greenville. Jen said she'd pick me up on the way, so I had a little bit of time to get ready.

So I go to put on my shoes, and putting on the left shoe, despite my best care, hurt like getting kicked in the nuts. But I did it anyway. They picked me up, and we went to Walmart. I got in a wide-load wheelchair (horray for big guys) and half the time Jen pushed me, half the time I pushed myself, but my previous experience with wheelchairs is another topic for another day. We had a great time; it was a highlight of the day being off my feet and mostly not worrying about them. (But now I kick myself for not getting certain things there I probably spent more on Walgreens this morning, but I'm getting ahead of myself.)

One of the things we were at Walmart for was a computer gamepad so Jen's mom and mom's boyfriend could play the Super Nintendo games on the computer without being stuck with awkward keyboard controls. I set her mom's boyfriend up right in Super Mario Allstars; he only plays Mario 1 and Mario 3, and now he has infinite lives in both. He claims he used to be a pro at both back in the day. I don't doubt him, that's me as well. Mario 1 was the first game I really got into, perhaps the first game I beat, and Mario 3 was the first game I bought with my own money (saved up allowance for months).

Then we got to talking about Jambalaya and Cajun foods. To make a long story short (since I really am getting offtopic), one of these days (like, when the wart is gone) we're going to go over there and make them some sausage and shrimp Jambalaya, a combination I haven't made before. I'm not a big fan of shrimp, but I'm only one of four who isn't, so if I pick the shrimp out of my plate and put it back, that's more for the rest of them. Likely I'll dish up first so they have more shrimp per scoop.

Back to the wart. Freakin' thing's been kicking my ass all day. Jen's mom got our nephews some M&Ms, and I promised I'd take them over, as I was planning on watching SmackDown! with my brother-in-law anyway.

Then we stopped at the pharmacy, and I got me an idea. They had the do-it-yourself freeze-off wart kits. I asked the pharmacist about it, and he was 110% sure it would work to just take care of it at home. So here I got a choice. Either suffer for a week on these salicylic acid pads that aren't doing squat, or do myself what the doc wants to do in a week. Decisions decisions. So I call up my stepmother, and after a good 20 minute conversation she's all behind me doing it myself.

But... there's always a but, isn't there? I open the container, and I'm reading the instructions. Seems this kit is only for small warts, not bigger ones like I got. So do I hold the applicator on the wart longer? Do I press hard? Do I apply three treatments all around it to get it all? So many questions, and all of them basically saying that the wart I have is too big to be treated by the home kit. But I don't think it's $20 wasted. Warts are contagious, and if Jen starts to get one, she can nip it in the bud right away.

Inevitably, Jen had to go to work. I putzed around on the Internet for a couple hours, and then popped in a DVD we'd picked up a month or three back but just never got around to watching yet: Lucky Number Slevin. Barring a longer review (it's coming! --Clerks II reference), let me just say that it was hot. Absolutely amazing. Morgan Freeman and Sir Ben Kingsley do great jobs (only partially because of such a witty script, the former at least shines in anything) and are well supported by Bruce Willis and Josh Hartnett. 9.5/10. Well, I guess that was a review, wasn't it? So what are you waiting for? Rent it if you like, but this is one worth owning.

By the time the movie ended, it was about 7:30. SmackDown starts at 8, so I pretty much high-tailed it over to my brother-in-law's place. I didn't last the whole show, around 9:30 I started getting tired, and left early, came back home and took a nap before Jen got home. I also got up with my boss, and found out I'm cleared on days off until the end of next week. I hate to miss hours, but I gotta do what I gotta do to get this taken care of, y'know?

Update #1 comes to a conclusion early Saturday morning, after Jen got off work. I tell her I want to go to Pitt County Memorial Hospital to have them freeze off the wart early. We weigh the options, and decide at 6:30am to go ahead and do it. We're out of the hospital by 9am - they're quick early in the morning. Of all the competent doctors (and PCMH has many), we get this House wannabe who made me feel like a tool for coming to the emergency room with something as insignificant as a wart, but the way he put it was alright. I mean, he was right, and Jen was trying her hardest not to laugh. At me, at the situation. So they prescribe me Ibuprofen (Advil, Motrin, et al for you non-technical folks), much stronger than you can buy over the counter. 800mg, the real deal. So I hobble back to the pharmacy to pick up the meds. Yeah, I know Walgreens has drive-through, but I wanted to get the "right" saly...whatever pads for my feet. I shoulda just trusted Jen to get the right ones.

So I get home, around 11am, I think. And in the past 26 hours, I've gotten maybe 3 hours of sleep. But none to worry, the bed is where I'm going now.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Why I like Kevin Smith's movies, what they mean to me (1)

I don't recall when I first heard of Kevin Smith. I do, however, remember when Clerks. came out. (The title has a period at the end, that isn't a typo.) I remember the tagline "Just because they serve you doesn't mean they like you" intriguing me, but I never rented it, to my loss. When I got high-speed Internet, the first movie I downloaded was Mallrats. Again, to my loss, I never found the time to watch it, but I downloaded it because someone said it was good. Then that hard drive crashed. I didn't know what Mallrats was or that it was connected to Clerks.. I just knew it was about a couple guys who spend most of the movie in the mall. Then, a few years later, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back came out. I saw a trailer and it looked funny, but I've never been a big fan of comedy, so I passed it up. Then I met the lady who would one day be my wife, and found out she's one of Kevin Smith's biggest fans. So I went back and watched the movies. I can't even remember what order I watched them in, though I think "Strike Back" was first because it was new.

Clerks. was Smith's first movie, came out in 1994. Shot in black-and-white, made on a $28,000 budget that Smith and a friend or two came up with out of their own pockets, at night at a convenience store Smith worked at during the day - the very same Quick Stop. Two ordinary guys, Dante, the passive one who works for the Quick Stop; Randal, his more sarcastic, arrogant friend who works at RST Video, next door. If you've never worked retail, you will probably miss the entire point of this film. If I were Emperor of the Universe, I would decree that to shop in a retail store, you would have to work for at least 2 years in retail - else you'd be limited to shopping online. Too many people make too many assumptions about the people who work in stores, whether it's an over- or underestimation. Clerks. is nothing more and nothing less than a day in the lives of two such individuals and their love lives, their Star Wars fandom, and their witty banter.

Mallrats came out the following year, and updated Smith's buddy comedy formula with color picture and a larger setting - the local mall. As I understand it, Mallrats actually takes place before Clerks. (this being important to a select few only) but uses none of the same characters. T.S. and Brody are two guys in their early 20s who never quite grew up. Brody still collects comic books and plays Sega, and while T.S. does neither, his reactions to his girlfriend shows he still has a way to go before being a man, and I think it's an important point that guys aren't fully grown at 18, despite what some of us may think. (I'm not even sure I'm fully grown at 27. I think the line between dude and man will be drawn when our first kid is born. If that doesn't do it, holding her in my arms, feeding her, and getting up in the middle of the night to change diapers, nothing will.) I would suggest girls aren't so mature then, either, but Mallrats takes it the other way, showing a 15-year-old girl who is more mature than any of the main male characters (as are the other women - especially Joey Adams). Mallrats was also the first of Smith's movies with any star power, though not at the time. Jason Lee (Brody) and Ben Affleck (Fashionable Male manager) would both go on to do a whole lot bigger movies. And Marvel (Spiderman, X-Men, et al) creator Stan Lee's cameo, as well. This is Smith's film with the least amount of scope, the least accomplished at the end, but that's not entirely bad - it's also one of the most approachable, and watching it doesn't really necessitate (or require) watching the others.

Chasing Amy was next, and in 1997 Kevin Smith got serious. This is one of two movies he's done that is more serious than funny, but in this case, only just barely. This is a buddy comedy as well - Mallrats alumni Ben Affleck and Jason Lee - with Mallrats costar Joey Adams as a lesbian the former falls in love with, despite warnings followed by grief from the latter. The Star Wars references are back in full "force" as well, as in a scene near the beginning, a black guy tells an all-white audience why Star Wars is how "the white man keeps the brother man down, even in a galaxy far, far away", with Affleck and Lee giving him a hard time throughout. If you thought that was great, the rest of the movie only gets better, with colorful and witty dialogue, mostly between Affleck and Adams. In addition to being serious, this is probably the most adult-oriented of all the movies, with extremely frank dialog about sex, most of it of the kinky variety (and I'm not just being hard on the lesbian stuff, that's just the tip of the iceberg). It's refreshing for mature adults, but I'd be worried about younger teenagers watching it. But then, I guess it's no worse than some of the newer teen comedies like American Pie and Scary Movie, but it's just done a lot better. I've always been a big advocate of civil rights, which usually means standing up for demographic groups targeted by the Christians for their members to harass - women, blacks, Muslims, homosexuals - and while Chasing Amy isn't really about lesbianism per se, it does challenge some conservative/popular viewpoints that need to be challenged, even in this day and age as so many people are still in the dark about these things. If you watch this and keep an open mind, you might learn something if you haven't already.

Dogma came out in 1999, last one of the last century. This one really put Smith in some hot water, though it didn't turn out to be as big a deal as DaVinci Code, Passion of the Christ, or anything like that, although it is basically based on the same conspiracy theory in DVC - that Jesus, in fact, fathered a child. But enough spoilers; Dogma follows a woman who must stop Ben Affleck and Matt Damon (as fallen angels) from entering a church in New Jersey and reversing God's will and thus unmaking the universe. Damon is not the only newcomer to Smithworld, as recurring stars George Carlin and Chris Rock start here, as well. This is also the first one to feature Jay and Silent Bob as more regular characters. Where I said before that Mallrats had the most narrow scope, Dogma has the widest - the fate of all existence hangs in the balance, and Smith almost makes you believe it as much as, if not more so, than the countless disaster movies that come out. Even as an Agnostic/Atheist/Undecided person who doesn't follow the Christian path, Dogma presents some interesting philisophical issues, for a comedy that follows a couple stoners. Nothing new, but interesting nonetheless. For the religious stuff, Dogma may be my least favorite of Kevin Smith's movies, but nonetheless it's still fun to watch once in a while.

I could review all seven of Smith's movies, but I'll stop after 4. Coming soon, my reviews of his next three movies and maybe some other miscellaneous stuff he's done. If Kevin himself should happen to read this, beyond what I've said already, I'd just like to say THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING, KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK; for the rest of you, if you haven't seen these movies, what are you waiting for?

Monday, August 13, 2007

Scary dream I had - slasher films

I believe the biggest reason I'm not afraid of horror movies or books is that I don't project myself into the situations, that I don't imagine myself in the situation.

Earlier I had a dream (I sleep days, remember) that, as a movie would be your average horror film. But since I was a part of it (I think), it was kind of scary. As with any dream, I only remember so much of it, but using logic and imagination, I can fill in some details.

The premise: A group of people held hostage in a furniture store by a madman. It doesn't sound like much, but this guy proves he is capable of anything - but he's not very capable. This furniture store is a free-standing building on a lot, with employee parking and freight docking in the back and a decent parking lot out front. Also in front, to the right of the entrance, are two trailers. One might transport two motorcycles, but also might be a weekend hotdog/popcorn/soda booth/stand. The other is a camper. The lights were off, but someone may live there. (The store owner?)

The hostages: As I write this I don't even know how many there are. I haven't stopped to count. So here they are:

The girl: Not the only girl, but that's her description, considering I don't know any names. She's the wild type, perhaps grew up in the country. Her major screen time in my dream was escaping, through the front door, while the madman was busy elsewhere. She runs down the parking lot, to the right to a convenience store, and tells the clerk what she knows. The lady behind the counter offers to call the police, but the girl doesn't trust them, and steals a Harley owned by the clerk, who reports it as stolen. The girl is caught about 20 miles up the road. Associates of the madman break into the jail and bring her back to the store.

The geek: This may or may not be the main character. He reminds me a lot of me, but I don't think he's the main guy. Anyway, he has a modified iPod with a camera and wireless transmitter on it. He's upstairs in the office when the madman and his associates break in, but he sees the action on his iPod's camera and tries, unsuccessfully, to hide. He's caught and tied to some large hand-truck/dollie, whatever they're called.

The geek's girlfriend: Oddly enough the geek has a girlfriend, and she's a freak. City girl, kinda Goth/Emo style - I thought of the love interest in The Waterboy. When the madman takes over, she knows she can't do anything, but she positions the geek's iPod to record the events in the hope that he sees and calls the police. Which he doesn't, for reasons unknown to me. Anyway, she is tied up same as he is, but before he gets caught. I think one or both of them were supposed to be tortured - I saw a knife - but I don't recall it actually being used.

The hero: I still don't know why this guy and the geek aren't the same character. I think that they might be, it's like I had the dream twice and in one they were, the other they weren't. In the one they weren't, though, this guy is your average Dude character, drives a muscle car, smokes, drinks, listens to classic rock, jeans and T-shirt.

He actually provokes the madman somehow. I saw him at the madman's place, maybe getting directions, maybe he had to use the phone, maybe car trouble, but something wasn't right and he had to get out of there. The guy may have been a hunter and talked openly of killing not just animals, but people as well - maybe kids. Anyway, the madman was a creep and the dude just wanted to move on. On his way out, though, he threw some trash out the side of his car in the madman's yard or driveway, and that set the madman off to begin with.

The dude/hero is the only other character that made an escape attempt. His was a little more thought-out, perhaps. He first runs to the left, around the corner, then around back. Then around to the right side of the building, and he creeps up to the front. The back and sides are fenced in, and there's nothing back there anyway - this is a small town. (Why it has a furniture store is beyond me, but I know it wasn't a grocery store.) So he comes back up along the right side, and creeps behind what may be the hotdog stand, then the trailer. I woke up shortly after this point, so I don't know if he gets away or tries a rescue attempt.

The black guy: There was also a black guy around the madman's home. I didn't see him around the furniture store, but he came around, I think he was a journalist writing a story about the Klan in the 21st century. He asked about the madman's five associates, who wore white masks and their features were obscured (nothing like the traditional Klan dunce cap and sheet) but he still suspected them of it. The madman said yes they were Klan, but they were his men. It's later revealed that they weren't, in fact one of them was black as well. Weird, I know, but this dream didn't make much sense.

There might be more, but you know how dreams fade, if you have them, that is. None of these events really took place chronologically, nor did they take place in the order I named them. I just posted on a first remember, first logged basis. But I stand back from the dream and just look at the story from the point of view of, well, anybody else, and I realize it's just your average slasher film. Below average, maybe, and probably not even deserving of an R rating. Another PG-13 horror film, cast the lastest Mickey Mouse Club alumni in the lead roles and someone like Dennis Hopper or Gene Hackman as the villain, and you have an instant blockbuster.

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Old Movie Review: Dungeons & Dragons (2000)

Last night - by which I mean early this morning - I picked out eleven movies out of our 300+ DVD collection. Jen's always been bad at making specific decisions, so I narrowed it down some. 20 minutes later, she still hadn't decided, but, well, nature calls and that b**** won't be put on hold. So I gave her a 10 minute extension. Not to be impatient or anything, but we don't want to be up all night.

I come out, and she's picked, of all things, Dungeons & Dragons. Which is a decent movie, but the least critically acclaimed of the selections, which included (off the top of my head) Bicentennial Man, Fight Club, The Doors, Total Recall, and What Dreams May Come. Dungeons & Dragons was ripped apart by Academy-chasing critics and fans of the roleplaying game alike, but it was really a fun movie to watch.

I used to play Dungeons & Dragons all the time when I was 14-16. It was Second Edition, which has been since replaced with Third Edition, and now 3.5, which means the rules and gameplay change - it's a whole new game now. As such, I was initially disappointed with this film. But my D&D days in the past, I look at it again, and it is not a bad movie. It doesn't represent D&D well, but that's fine. It seems they didn't set out to make a D&D movie - which, I imagine, would be more accurately about people playing D&D, and the positive and negative impacts it has on their lives.

No, Dungeons & Dragons - the New Line movie - is a generic Lord of the Rings inspired fantasy film (the pen-and-paper roleplaying game was itself based on and inspired by Tolkien's work) which happened to be blessed by the TSR (now Wizards of the Coast) license. As such, it's better than Eragon, which simply plagairized the greats. The story itself is fine, but sprinkled throughout are stereotypical characters designed to highlight some of the basics of D&D. We have the mage, the thief, the fighter, the dwarf, the elf, a couple orcs in the bar, Beholders, and of course, dragons.

In many movies, cheesy dialogue helps to bring a cheesy movie down, but I would argue that the cheesy dialogue helps Dungeons & Dragons. Since the characters perpetuate their stereotypes so well, the cheesiness is expected and mostly forgiven. Again, the story is fairly good, although it does have some holes. Try not to think too much (for example asking yourself why a liberal young girl is Emperess in a Fascist empire run by corrupted Mages) and you'll probably enjoy the movie. Once it gets going, it's easy to get caught up in the adventure and even feel for some of the characters.

The graphics in this movie are stunning. It might overuse CGI with those castle shots, but the dragons are all well done. If you like dragon movies, the beginning and end will not disappoint. It beats, in terms of dragon use, Reign of Fire. (Not sure about Dragonheart, it's been too long. Connery owns all, but Draco was just one dragon, and there are tons here, fighting one another, and the way the second one dies is awesome.) The sound is pretty good - not quite as good as in a Star Wars movie (any of the six, it doesn't matter), but it's along the same lines.

Overall, this is a good movie that fans of fantasy adventure really shouldn't miss. It isn't the best, but it's at least worth a rent if you haven't got anything else you particularly want to see.